“There is no surprise more magical than the surprise of being loved. It is God’s finger on man’s shoulder”.  ~Charles Morgan

I got a new tattoo – lots of layers of symbolism  and meaning.   But this isn’t really about the picture – it is about the process. I am not going to sugar coat it, this new art hurt… a lot! One spot hurt worse than the rest, one spot hurt from the very first touch. You probably guessed it already; the part that hurt the worst was the heart. I remember thinking at that point – there is probably something pretty metaphorical about that… the heart makes the boldest statement but has the greatest capacity to hurt – real, soul-wrenching hurt.

I am pondering this heart picture when I was reminded of another favorite movie quote (quite possibly because I was watching the movie again). Frozen! The first time the family visits the wise trolls to save their daughter the elder troll, Grand Pabbie, very eloquently points out, “you are lucky it wasn’t her heart. The heart is not so easily changed, but the head can be persuaded.” I think Grand Pabbie may have been paraphrasing scripture there.

Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows through it.”

For a long time, the heart has been my favorite shape. I have always felt there is poetry in the human heart. A heart can love fully but can also hurt deeply; and cause hurt. A heart can even hate and devise schemes to cause others damage. It is like a flower that can transform to a fire-breathing dragon – one takes in the gentle fragrance only to find themselves burnt to the core by the power. God knew from the beginning the power and beauty held within our hearts. Scripture after scripture attests to the power of the heart to do good and harm. God created us with an immense capacity for love and a deep desire to be loved. But we live in an imperfect world with imperfect people whose hearts have not been treated with care – whose hearts have not been protected. Those people – all around us – have a great power to transform their hurt and pain to those around them. It is probably why every pastor has the line “hurting people hurt people” in their arsenal. It is the reality of the world we get to dance in everyday. Capacity for great things, great love, and great happiness – scattered among obstacles and landmines we often know nothing about and can’t control where they explode.

So what is the answer? Avoid people?

I don’t think so. God started our story warning against it.

Genesis 2:18 “The Lord God said, ‘it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’.”

Right there at the very beginning; it is not good for man to be alone. I wrote a poem about that not long ago – Defeating Alone http://wp.me/p4KHr6-1u. Alone is dangerous and God knew it from the beginning. Even He isn’t alone, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Scriptures tell us over and over the good being with other people.

Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider how we may spurn one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another – and all the more as you see the day approaching.”

Matthew 18:20 “For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them.”

Hebrews 3:18 “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.”

We need togetherness. We need other people. We were not created to be alone. It is not good for us to be alone. We need others encouragement, leadership and fellowship in our lives. But that need means we are vulnerable at our core – at our heart – at the heart of who we are. We are open to love but can be hurt. We rely on friends but can feel abandoned or let down by them. We rely on family to protect and guide us but that very family can abuse and neglect us. We open ourselves to the world and therefore to the potential joy and pain of the world. And we see all the time hearts that have been hardened by their exposure to the world. I believe if you really looked at the story behind the people you see as angry, mean, hardened people – you would find a story that did not take care of their heart.

On a youth mission once, doing an ice-breaker, we asked “if you could spend time with anyone from any time in history, who would you choose?”  One young woman answered Hitler. This of course was shocking to many – answers like Gandhi, Mandela and Mother Theresa were far more standard. So the barrage of ‘why on earth would you choose him’ questions followed. Her answer seemed simple and a bit naïve – but on closer look was probably more astute than most teens could be. Her answer, “I think if someone, anyone, had just reached out to Hitler in love – given him a hug – the whole evil history could have been changed.” Look at his history – his father is described as having a terrible temper, bad attitude, was obnoxious, conceited, and often took his problems out on his children. Hurting people hurt people. Jim Jones’ mother was always working and his father was emotionally abusive. Joseph Stalin’s father beat his wife and children. Jeffrey Dahmer’s mother was tense, greedy for attention and highly argumentative.

The world has such a power to hurt people; to harden hearts that were designed for love… and as Grand Pabbie so perfectly said, the heart is not so easily changed. We desire love deeply – but once a heart has closed itself it is hard to change.

“The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.” ~~ Mother Theresa

The mind is easy to change. We change our tastes and opinions all the time, sometimes during a single conversation. The world around us has a constant impact on what we think. But a heart of stone often remains cold and hard.

So far this sounds pretty hopeless. The world hurts – hardens hearts – and the cycle repeats; and it is very hard to change. Really though, this is the most hope filled story I could tell, because our God turns stone to flesh. What is impossible in the world is God’s great gift.

Ezekiel 36:26 “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you, I will remove your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

God walks with us, fights for us, comforts, and – most importantly – He loves us with a love that this world cannot ever match. When our trust is in God, when our love comes from God, the world’s power in our life is diminished. With God’s heart our hard heart breaks into a heart of flesh – a heart open to love; a heart less likely to hurt others.

Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still.”

Psalm 23:14 “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”

“You don’t have to go looking for love, it is where you come from.” ~~ Werner Erhard

My life is a story of this hope, this love, this God who changes hearts and changes the world. I lived a lot of years with a heart of stone. It was rock formed from years of hurt, hurt from the world that was supposed to love me and then hurt from the world I built around me – my own destructive choices hurting a lot of people around me and hurting myself. I got to a place where I had no hope for a life different from the one I knew. I had a heart locked away without hope or love. I believed that I just wasn’t worth love. I believed that the life I lived was just the life I would always have. I believed that the love and happiness I saw others enjoying would just never be part of my life. I lived in extreme darkness and despair. I was hurting – and without knowing any other way – I was hurting others. I was dragging the people around me into the darkness with me. But somehow, someway, God’s love broke through – God’s love found me. God’s love rescued me.

“The love game is never called off on account of darkness” ~~Tom Masson

I know that it is because people prayed for me. I found my way out of the darkness because there were people around me who didn’t let my failure break them away. I had people surrounding me who didn’t let my brokenness harden their hearts – who didn’t let my heart of stone drag them into my darkness. There were people who kept hold of love – God’s love – and who brought the light of that love into my darkness. There were people who did not give up on the hurting, hardened, angry, hurtful person I had become. I found God’s love because of people who kept feeding God’s love into my life through their lives. They stayed until I found my way out of the darkness; until I hit my knees and gave my heart to God. I gave Him my heart to heal. I opened my heart to real love. I opened myself to love that has not failed me and never will. My heart of stone transformed to a real, beating, feeling heart – not overnight – but over time. There are days that I still fall back, that I feel the hurt, harden and hurt others. But I always grasp to my heavenly Father’s perfect love and back to the heart of love – back to a place where I can love others as God first loves me. I fight until I am back where God has my whole heart.

Matthew 22:37-39 “Jesus replied ‘love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind! This is the first and greatest commandment, and the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself’.”

And this is why my lioness is grasping/cradling/protecting a human heart – my heart – rooted firmly into the rock that she rests on.

Ephesians 3:17-19 “So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep Is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

I cling to God’s love. I root myself in faith to the rock, which will always hold firm. I rest in His love, His grace, and His perfect gift to me.

Do you know God’s love? Have you let Him into your heart; to heal the hurts the world has put in? Have you let Him turn your heart of stone to a heart of flesh? Do you ask Him daily to open your heart to be loved by Him, and to love the world with His love?

1 John 4:19 “We love because He first loved us”.

John 13:34-35 “A new command I give you: love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

John 15:12 “my command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”

Let God’s love wash over you.

Love other’s the way God loves you.

Change the world.

“It’s astounding how little one feels alone when one loves.” ~~ John Buliever

“Love one another and you will be happy. It is as simple and as complicated as that.”  ~~ Michael Leunig

I have seen dozens of movies that portray the whole military, boot camp, drill sergeant routine. It is always a big man with veins popping in his neck, yelling in the face of the young enlistees. His job is to scream the spirit out of them – to break them so they can be rebuilt the way the military wants them. I have not been in the military; I have not actually witnessed or experienced real boot camp, so I cannot attest to the accuracy of the picture the movies portray. I have, though, seen life act this very way over and over again. A loud, screaming, yelling, noisy life that given the chance tries to break the spirit and faith in me and tries to mold me into the same, worldly, walking dead who surround me in everyday life.

I think satan is a master at noise – he builds up so much noise in my world it gets hard to defeat, to silence, to fight through the noise and to keep my peace and focus. He uses everyday noise. He uses personal noise. He throws a cacophony of awful, screeching, terrifying stormy noise – all designed to distract me from God and from God’s still small voice in my life.

The noise isn’t always spectacular or special. Recently I was diagnosed with sever anemia. Given that my hemoglobin numbers every year prior were completely normal, this was concerning to my doctor. So very quickly we pursued a number of different diagnostic procedures to find out why I very suddenly had such a low number. Very quickly I had lots of procedures, preparations for procedures, blood draws and appointments. Many different doctors all throwing their two cents in. many well meaning (but not doctors) people throwing their two cents in. suddenly I was weighed down by all the pennies from everyone’s two cents. I had so much information – noise – coming at me at once that I couldn’t’ make sense of any of it. The noise of all the information was drowning out any understanding, any faith, I could find in the situation. Satan was very successfully distracting me from the only real information that I needed. God is the ultimate healer and always had me and this situation in His hands. As soon as I silenced the world’s noise; peace was mine.

1 Samuel 2:9 “He will guard the feet of His faithful servants, but the wicked will be silenced in the place of darkness. It is not by strength that one prevails.”

Psalm 4:8 “In peace I will lie down and sleep, for You alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.”

Psalm 42:7-8 “Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me. By day the Lord directs His love, at night His song is with me – a prayer to the God of my life.”

This noise happens more spectacularly during times of trial – during the storms and valleys we all will inevitably face. During these times satan isn’t subtle – the noise isn’t just regular information bombarding me. During trials, the noise becomes much more personal. A lost job and suddenly I hear “God clearly doesn’t care about you”. A kid is struggling with addiction and the parent is told it must be the way they raised the child. A friend faces a serious diagnosis and they feel they must not be living good enough, they are being punished by God for their sins. In times of trial the noise that attacks me tries to convince me that it is my fault, that I have somehow done something to bring it on or not done something to prevent it. I hear the thunder and the waves and become so blind from all the noise that I cannot find my anchor. I cannot find the God that I know never promised life would be easy – but who did promise He would walk every step of it with me. When I shut out the noise of the world, I can cling to my anchor and refuse to sink in the storm.

Psalm 46:1-3 “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.”

Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Even with all this daily noise and spectacular noise – I find the nosiest place in my life is around my faith. It is a resounding noise of the world against that which they don’t understand. They don’t understand the fact that I know God; God who loves me unconditionally without me doing a thing except accepting Him and His Son who He sent to atone for my sin. It is hard for many to understand this and they surround me with their noise. These people who have tried everything they can to fill the hole that only God was meant to fill, they try to drag me into their emptiness with them.. The voices that tell me doing drugs, getting drunk all the time, sleeping with a bunch of guys, lying, cheating, stealing – these are all just the way the world works. They try to convince me that everyone lives this way – there is nothing wrong with it, and I should live this way too. They try to convince me my life will be better if I just join what “everyone” else is doing. There is so much noise to conform to the world it is hard to fight. It is hard not to let the noise just take over and carry me off.

But oh the joy in the silence, in tuning in to God’s perfect purpose and plan in my life.

Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

With all this noise yelling in my face – how do I get to the silence? God gave me the formula.

Ephesians 6:10-18 “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devils schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground and after you have done everything, stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waste, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feat fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.”

Read the Word, write it on my heart. Pray. Stand in faith. Go into every battle, every day-to-day situation and everything in between – firmly planted in faith, in God! God’s still small voice is always there, always waiting patiently for me to just lean in and listen., to really hear Him. He is the peace in the everyday. He is the perseverance in the storm. He is the way, the truth and the life. He is the armor for every battle.

He is the silencer.

He quiets all the clanging noise trying to rob me of my life.

John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heats be troubled and do not be afraid.”

Colossians 3:15 “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since a members of one body you were called to peace and be thankful”

Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.”

Jump out of the noise.

Sink deep into His silence and hear the amazing promises God has waiting for you.

We have all heard the half-empty / half-full glass comparison. It is supposed to signify the way we view the world. This picture supposedly proves if you are optimistic or pessimistic. Personally, I think it only proves how thirsty you are!

There is a game I like to play on my IPad – it is a 3-dimensional version of the classic Mah-Jong. 3-D, the board moves up, down, sideways and diagonal-ways. Sometimes, to find the match, you actually have to move the board – the piece is otherwise completely hidden. Sometimes I find even when the match is not actually hidden – just shifting the board helps me see the match that is right out in front of me. All it takes is a change in my perspective to see the whole board totally differently and to gain victory.

Perspective is defined as a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something. Perspective is our point of view. Perspective in our world is shaped by a lot of factors, our upbringing, education, friends, beliefs and even just the type of day we are having. It is grey and cloudy outside and that same slow driver that entertained us yesterday when it was sunny is making us crazy. A boss yells at you and suddenly you have less patience with the people you are caring for – less patience and grace for your own direct reports, patients or customers.

But here is the great news; when you realize that you approach people, decisions, and life based on your perspective – than you know how to make major changes in your life… just change your perspective. That slow driver isn’t keeping you from getting somewhere, he is giving you the chance to slow down and enjoy the journey. That boss that just yelled at you is not a bad, evil, mean person – but probably just got yelled at herself, or she as a looming weight, bad news, bad report – that makes her scared. She needs love and grace, not judgment and returned anger. That diagnosis is not a death sentence but a chance for God to work miracles in your life and for your life to speak life into others.

That is what faith is really. Faith is a daily Change in perspective. Just believing in my God, in His Son and the real / perfect grace He gives to me requires me to have a different perspective than the world or logic dictates. I can’t see Him – but I don’t look for Him through those worldly eyes; I know he is there. Because I have faith, my glass is never half-empty or half-full – Jesus steps in with His supply of living water and fills me full. He covers the difference, the short fall in my life. With Jesus, my glass is always full.

Ephesians 3:16-19 “I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so  that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

I thought I had a pretty solid faith but a couple things lately have me looking just a little closer at my faith. See, even in faith I was approaching God looking through a lens of limitation. My perspective was impacted by the world’s limitations. God was never meant to be bound by our earthly limitations.

About a week ago, I got some not good news. My grandpa was not doing well. I was told I must make certain I got to see him when I went home for the holiday and that I should be prepared because he looked really, really bad. Every word spoken to me dripped of “he is dying, get your bum down to see him”. I was emotionally rocked. I was afraid he wouldn’t make it until I got home, and that I wouldn’t get the chance to tell him I loved him and that he would pass not knowing that.

Suddenly, my glass was empty. I was empty. I couldn’t get myself out of the emotion to a place where I could give my fears and my heart to God. My perspective was blurred and blinded by the tears in my eyes. But God stepped in and helped me change my perspective. God reminded me that I don’t see Him yet I know that He loves me because of the lifetime of love He has given to me. In the same way, my grandpa knows I love him because I have told him so throughout my lifetime. Suddenly I was so much more at peace – my point of view fully shifted. If I couldn’t get home in time, I would be ok. My glass was refilling.

But God wasn’t done.

Oh how wildly limited was that perspective I had.

God had bigger plans – plans to do way more than just refill my cup.

I saw my grandpa the other day – I made it home “in time”. Turns out, that was the wrong perspective anyway. My grandpa… he looks really good. Instead of being at the end as everyone in my family assumed – they figured out he was taking double the medication he was supposed to take. Once that was corrected – he is doing much better. Yet I hadn’t believed that could be possible.

My faith was small.

My faith was limited by the small perspective I was focused on.

I was talking to a friend about that small faith and how God keeps showing me I need to believe. Believe bigger, because He is greater than everything. I started thinking about faith – about changing my faith perspective. Breaking out of the box I had shoved me and God into. I opened up YouVersion for my daily scripture reading and this is the first thing I read:

Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

Faith is believing.

Believing without any real reason to believe, other than God is who He says He is and is not limited. Believing bigger than our imaginations can even dream.

Believing bigger that someone will be completely healed instead of just “being comfortable’ at the end. Believing bigger; that that the most off track, addicted, broken, hopeless person that we know today will be completely restored and walking with God tomorrow. Believing bigger that a “homeless” church that is reaching thousands in a city where real estate is gold and that gold is hard to find – that church will be given a permanent home and will reach tens of thousands more. Believing for love greater than anything we can earthly imagine.

He tells us as plainly as possible, believe BIGGER.

Matthew 17:20 “He replied, ‘ because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, move from here to there, and it will more. Nothing will be impossible for you.’”

James 1:6 “But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”

Faith.

Believe Bigger!

I am taking that glass I have confined God to and smashing it. I no longer look to God to just fill me – just cover the difference. I am believing bigger. He wants to give me greater gifts than any half-full / half-empty glass could ever hold. And I am standing in faith – believing bigger – for everything He has promised and wants to give me. I ask extravagantly because He calls me to have a bigger faith in His extravagance.

Don’t focus on how full or empty your glass is; smash the glass and focus on how incomparably great your God is.

Believe Bigger!!

I’ve been on a movie quote roll – and last night when talking to a friend of mine, one of my favorite chick-flick sappy line favorites fell into place with a whole stream of thought. It started with this though; God is the best, and I am just loving this crazy dance He lets me be a part of. And then my friend danced for me – in emoji! I love it when he does that because I know that it signifies shared happiness. And all this together put the movie quote on my heart. It is from Hope Floats (I warned you it was a chick flick line). Harry Connick Jr.’s character approaches Sandra Bullock’s character at a barn dance and says, “Dancing is just a conversation between two people, talk to me”.

I love dancing, literally and as an emotional picture. Dancing is moving, it communicates feelings. Dancing can be romantic, vibrant, fire or calm. Dancing is truly a conversation with anyone who is willing to listen. I’m a bit of a theater buff and I love the way Billy Elliott (from the musical of the same name) answers when asked “what does it feel like when you are dancing”.

“I can’t really explain it, I haven’t got the words. It’s a feeling that you can’t control. I suppose it’s like forgetting, losing who you are, and at the same time, something makes you whole. It’s like that there’s some music, playing in your ear, and I’m listening, and I’m listening, and then I disappear. And then I feel a change, like a fire deep inside, something bursting me wide open, impossible to hide. And suddenly I’m flying, flying like a bird. Like electricity, electricity, sparks inside of me, and I’m free, I’m free. It’s a bit like being angry, it’s a bit like being scared, confused and all mixed up and mad as hell. It’s like when you’ve been crying, and your empty and your full, I don’t know what it is, it’s hard to tell.” [Elton John’s Electricity, Billy Elliott]

That is my faith, every word; it is what my dance with God feels like. That crazy, calm, vibrant, romantic conversation with my Lord and with the life that He lets me live; that He has lain out before me. It is this unknown, electric, fire that I don’t have the words to describe. But when I get off the side of the dance floor and join into God’s rhythm – I’m free, I’m flying. I disappear and God’s dance breaks me into His music, into Him.

I look around me at all that is good and I dance. I have amazing friends – friends who dance every step with me; lead me, guide me, serve with me, worship with me and pray with me. I have a good job, family, passions and the ability to enjoy them, I have been able to travel the world and I have been able to truly experience love and grace. Life is good – and good times make the dance easier. Actually, the good makes the dance a natural response in praise of the God who makes it all possible.

2 Samuel 6:14 “Wearing a linen ephod, David was dancing before the Lord with all His might.”

Psalm 149:2-3 “Let Israel rejoice in their maker, let the people of Zion be glad in their King. Let them praise His name with dancing and make music to Him with timbrel and harp.”

But dancing isn’t just a response to good things happening around me. It is also how I survive the valleys and the storms. See, there are times when I just don’t feel as close to God. The valleys, and we all have them in our walk; time’s when I feel totally separated, times when it is hard to hear His voice if I hear it at all, when I feel totally alone, left out on my own. It is in these valley times when it could be very easy to just disappear – from faith, from friends, from life. I have learned in these times that the only way I can survive is to cling to Jesus – pull Him in closer and let Him lead. At these times the dance slows, it becomes more intimate – I focus more intently on Him until I find myself back in the rhythm and the light.

Isaiah 41:13 “For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you do not fear, I will help you.”

Psalm 40:1-3 “I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in Him.”

Psalm 61:2 “From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint, lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

It is the same in the storms, when life attacks from all directions. The dance becomes almost violent – spinning out of control – bounced around by trials, disease, hurt, sin, addiction, anger, jealousy, lust, worry, fear – thrown around like a ragdoll. The only way to survive the storm is to grasp tightly to the Rock. He keeps me from being drowned by the raging waters. I cling to Him, dance with Him through it instead of trying to fight it on my own. I cling to Him with faith that He always brings me safely through. I may not be able to see anything ahead of me. Like a ballet dancer spinning – the key is to focus on one point to keep from losing balance and place. That focus point is Jesus, in the storm I focus only on Jesus and let Him take care of the world blasting around me on all sides.

Jeremiah 31:13 “Then young women will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.”

Psalm 27:1 “The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?”

1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

My dance is also an internal dance. It is how I walk my faith. It is how Jesus and I have a conversation every day. Dancing is a conversation between two people – it is intimate and personal. To truly dance well with a partner, to be in step and graceful, you have to really know each other. God already knows everything about me – He created me perfectly as I am. I am the one who keeps stepping on His toes. I am the one who gets out of His perfect rhythm. But much like a dancer – if I put my heart into the work, I practice and I am willing to sweat a bit – I can draw closer and better in the dance with my perfect partner. I learn Him, I write His Word on my heart. I pray to Him, I talk with Him, and I listen to Him. I seek that music that is in my ear, strain to hear it, and strive to lose my self-focused noise and disappear into Him. The more I know Him, the better our dance becomes.

Romans 12:1-2 “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God – this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

I love this dance I join every day – and I love that I have the best dance partner that I could ever have. He leads me. He takes control (as long as I let Him) and keeps me on the floor. His rhythm is perfect for me. He knows me better – more intimately than any other partner ever could. There are a lot of people on the floor; some with me, some against me, some twirl me, and some try to throw me down. But my partner has me, I put my trust in Him and He takes care of the dance.

Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

Dancing with God takes work and sweat, it is definitely not always easy – but it is a dance of freedom and joy and peace. It is electricity bursting in me.

I love the conversation I dance with God.

He is waiting to talk to you, dance with Him!

There are a lot of really great women in the bible. Admittedly there are a lot of not so great ones too, even a couple downright bad ones. But I like to focus on the really good ones because us women – we are the bride, we hold so much power to impact this world – and we read some really great role models to help us navigate the path God has in front of us. So whether we learn loyalty and obedience from Ruth, or wisdom in who we surround ourselves with from Esther, or grace, gratitude and sharing our faith from the woman at the well, or how to give from the old widow who have her only two coins at offering – what the women of the bible have to teach us can guide us in this life. I should note, these really great women were not necessarily perfect… a perfect story is not what made them great. The woman at the well… definitely not a great back-story but her story is great because of her response to God and how she reacted after she radically encountered Christ. I am thankful for all of the beautiful women who guide me in the scriptures.

Like Rahab.

Joshua 2:1-7 “Then Joshua son of Nun secretly sent two spies from Shittim. “Go, look over the land,” he said, “especially Jericho.” So they went and entered the house of a prostitute named Rahab and stayed there. The king of Jericho was told, “Look, some of the Israelites have come here tonight to spy out the land.” So the king of Jericho sent this message to Rahab: “Bring out the men who came to you and entered your house, because they have come to spy out the whole land.” But the woman had taken the two men and hidden them. She said, “Yes, the men came to me, but I did not know where they had come from.  At dusk, when it was time to close the city gate, they left. I don’t know which way they went. Go after them quickly. You may catch up with them.” (But she had taken them up to the roof and hidden them under the stalks of flax she had laid out on the roof.) So the men set out in pursuit of the spies on the road that leads to the fords of the Jordan, and as soon as the pursuers had gone out, the gate was shut.”

So this is how Rahab’s story begins. In the very first sentence we learn that Rahab is a prostitute. This right away tells us everything we need to know right? Rahab definitely does not have a perfect back-story, but then again, it was because of her profession that her home would seem to be the perfect place for the spies to go. Guys coming in and out of her home would not have been unusual – and she would have heard the news from inside and outside the walls of Jericho. Had Rahab been a good girl, we would probably know nothing of her story. But because she has a very real story – we actually get to see what to me is the picture of a great faith.

See, we can ell already that Rahab – not an Israelite – knows that there is something different that she wants and that is must be the God of the Israelites. She would have heard the stories of the miracles He had performed. But at this point, I can already tell there is something about these Israelites that she wanted more of because of how she responds. The king sent the message. The king was the top dog – and had the power to take life and livelihood or freedom from those in his city walls who displeased him. Yet Rahab immediately and phenomenally lies directly to the king’s messengers. She put her own life in danger to protect two men she knew nothing about other than they were men of the God she wanted deep inside to know. She protects these two men at great personal risk because she knew something… even if she didn’t know what it was she knew.

Joshua 2:8-14 “Before the spies lay down for the night, she went up on the roof and said to them, “I know that the Lord has given you this land and that a great fear of you has fallen on us, so that all who live in this country are melting in fear because of you. We have heard how the Lord dried up the water of the Red Sea or you when you came out of Egypt, and what you did to Sihon and Og, the two kings of the Amorites east of the Jordan, whom you completely destroyed.  When we heard of it, our hearts melted in fear and everyone’s courage failed because of you, for the Lord your God is God in heaven above and on the earth below.“Now then, please swear to me by the Lord that you will show kindness to my family, because I have shown kindness to you. Give me a sure sign that you will spare the lives of my father and mother, my brothers and sisters, and all who belong to them—and that you will save us from death. “Our lives for your lives!” the men assured her. “If you don’t tell what we are doing, we will treat you kindly and faithfully when the Lord gives us the land.”

Rahab proceeds to let the men out to safety and directs them on where to hide to avid the pursuers. And they agree that all in her home will be saved, and to identify her home – she ties a scarlet cord out the window. Rahab knew that everyone feared these people and their God, but somewhere in her she knew that the God of these men was the answer. That God was what she longed for, ached for, and desired in her heart. She saw in these two men hope for a different life than she had led. She knew somewhere deep in her heart with a faith that was based only on stories that she had heard – she knew that the only way she and her family could really live was to find a way to this God of the Israelites. She knew God was the hope.

I love this picture of faith. Because Rahab and me, we are an awful lot alike. For years I found my security in the arms of men. I gave up everything – every part of me, gave it away because it was the only way I knew how to live. It was the only way I knew how to survive. Each ended relationship took a lot more from me than it had ever fed into my life. I paid high prices each time I gave myself away, things I can never get back, things I can never undo. I built up in my life walls of guilt and shame and pain. But somewhere in that hardened, hurting heart of mine I knew. I knew there was something better. I knew and hoped for a totally different life. I heard stories about God. This God! And my heart started to hope even more. Somewhere in me there was a very real faith that if I could only somehow get to this God, that I could live in real freedom. That the oppressive chains that held me down, the guilt, the shame, the pain, the regret – there was an answer if I could only get to God.

Fortunately in my life, it didn’t take risking myself and hiding a couple spies and lying to a king. My freedom was easier. It took walking through a lot of church doors until I found a pair that opened to a place that felt like home, that took away all my excuses.

My heart broke, but in that breaking was freedom. It was painful, tear-filled freedom that broke the solid shell of my heart and my world. I found Him – that God of the Israelites. I found the Christ that everyone promised would overcome all the evil, including death. I found the One my heart yearned for, cried out for – the One my heart always knew was right there. And that faith only exploded because when I found Him there was no denying He was real, He was power, He was grace, and He was love.

Pure and perfect love like I had never known before; that I had never found in all the arms I had allowed to hold me before. And those human arms I no longer allowed to oppress me.

I found Him.

Rahab found Him.

Joshua 6:22-25 “Joshua said to the two men who had spied out the land, “Go into the prostitute’s house and bring her out and all who belong to her, in accordance with your oath to her.” So the young men who had done the spying went in and brought out Rahab, her father and mother, her brothers and sisters and all who belonged to her. They brought out her entire family and put them in a place outside the camp of Israel. Then they burned the whole city and everything in it, but they put the silver and gold and the articles of bronze and iron into the treasury of the Lord’s house. But Joshua spared Rahab the prostitute, with her family and all who belonged to her, because she hid the men Joshua had sent as spies to Jericho—and she lives among the Israelites to this day.”

And how do we know she made the Israelite’s her family? How do we know she found their God? Just read the lineage of Christ, you find this, “Solmon, the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab”. Yes, there she is. The prostitutes who knew with faith but that in the love of God was where she needed to be… right there in the lineage of Christ.

And here is the kicker of the story. The part I missed probably the first hundred times I read it. We always think the story is about the spies, about the eventual success destroying Jericho. But I think the story was always about Rahab. God knew her heart all along, God knew her desire for Him – He heard her cries at night to find her way to Him – He knew her faith in Him though she didn’t yet know Him. And He stayed to His promise to not lose one of the children whose heart is focused on Him.

John 6:39 “And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day.”

Because – catch this now – three days later the spies get back to Joshua and tell him what they learned. Then…

Joshua 3:1 “Early in the morning Joshua and all the Israelites set out from Shittim and went to the Jordan, where they camped before crossing over.”

Did you catch it? Early in the morning… Joshua had already prepared the Israelites to move forward. Joshua was not waiting on the report of the spies. The information they brought back was not even a little bit important in the story. Jericho would still have been overcome had the spies never been sent out. It would have all still happened, everything except Rahab’s salvation. Rahab, the prostitute now found in the lineage of Christ. Rahab, who tied a scarlet cord of faith to the window of the home where she sold herself to step out into life, freedom and grace in God’s family. Rahab, who tied that scarlet cord in faith of a God that she did not yet know. Maybe the spies were not sent for information, maybe God’s plan for them was greater – maybe God’s plan was one amazing woman of faith and her salvation.

And you know what? He fought that hard for me too. He sent person after person into my land, my home, my world; until I figured out how to tie that scarlet cord of surrender on my window and step out into that same life, that same freedom and that same grace.

And He is fighting that hard for you too. Are you ready to break free in shining scarlet faith?