“There is no surprise more magical than the surprise of being loved. It is God’s finger on man’s shoulder”.  ~Charles Morgan

I got a new tattoo – lots of layers of symbolism  and meaning.   But this isn’t really about the picture – it is about the process. I am not going to sugar coat it, this new art hurt… a lot! One spot hurt worse than the rest, one spot hurt from the very first touch. You probably guessed it already; the part that hurt the worst was the heart. I remember thinking at that point – there is probably something pretty metaphorical about that… the heart makes the boldest statement but has the greatest capacity to hurt – real, soul-wrenching hurt.

I am pondering this heart picture when I was reminded of another favorite movie quote (quite possibly because I was watching the movie again). Frozen! The first time the family visits the wise trolls to save their daughter the elder troll, Grand Pabbie, very eloquently points out, “you are lucky it wasn’t her heart. The heart is not so easily changed, but the head can be persuaded.” I think Grand Pabbie may have been paraphrasing scripture there.

Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows through it.”

For a long time, the heart has been my favorite shape. I have always felt there is poetry in the human heart. A heart can love fully but can also hurt deeply; and cause hurt. A heart can even hate and devise schemes to cause others damage. It is like a flower that can transform to a fire-breathing dragon – one takes in the gentle fragrance only to find themselves burnt to the core by the power. God knew from the beginning the power and beauty held within our hearts. Scripture after scripture attests to the power of the heart to do good and harm. God created us with an immense capacity for love and a deep desire to be loved. But we live in an imperfect world with imperfect people whose hearts have not been treated with care – whose hearts have not been protected. Those people – all around us – have a great power to transform their hurt and pain to those around them. It is probably why every pastor has the line “hurting people hurt people” in their arsenal. It is the reality of the world we get to dance in everyday. Capacity for great things, great love, and great happiness – scattered among obstacles and landmines we often know nothing about and can’t control where they explode.

So what is the answer? Avoid people?

I don’t think so. God started our story warning against it.

Genesis 2:18 “The Lord God said, ‘it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’.”

Right there at the very beginning; it is not good for man to be alone. I wrote a poem about that not long ago – Defeating Alone http://wp.me/p4KHr6-1u. Alone is dangerous and God knew it from the beginning. Even He isn’t alone, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Scriptures tell us over and over the good being with other people.

Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider how we may spurn one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another – and all the more as you see the day approaching.”

Matthew 18:20 “For where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them.”

Hebrews 3:18 “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.”

We need togetherness. We need other people. We were not created to be alone. It is not good for us to be alone. We need others encouragement, leadership and fellowship in our lives. But that need means we are vulnerable at our core – at our heart – at the heart of who we are. We are open to love but can be hurt. We rely on friends but can feel abandoned or let down by them. We rely on family to protect and guide us but that very family can abuse and neglect us. We open ourselves to the world and therefore to the potential joy and pain of the world. And we see all the time hearts that have been hardened by their exposure to the world. I believe if you really looked at the story behind the people you see as angry, mean, hardened people – you would find a story that did not take care of their heart.

On a youth mission once, doing an ice-breaker, we asked “if you could spend time with anyone from any time in history, who would you choose?”  One young woman answered Hitler. This of course was shocking to many – answers like Gandhi, Mandela and Mother Theresa were far more standard. So the barrage of ‘why on earth would you choose him’ questions followed. Her answer seemed simple and a bit naïve – but on closer look was probably more astute than most teens could be. Her answer, “I think if someone, anyone, had just reached out to Hitler in love – given him a hug – the whole evil history could have been changed.” Look at his history – his father is described as having a terrible temper, bad attitude, was obnoxious, conceited, and often took his problems out on his children. Hurting people hurt people. Jim Jones’ mother was always working and his father was emotionally abusive. Joseph Stalin’s father beat his wife and children. Jeffrey Dahmer’s mother was tense, greedy for attention and highly argumentative.

The world has such a power to hurt people; to harden hearts that were designed for love… and as Grand Pabbie so perfectly said, the heart is not so easily changed. We desire love deeply – but once a heart has closed itself it is hard to change.

“The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.” ~~ Mother Theresa

The mind is easy to change. We change our tastes and opinions all the time, sometimes during a single conversation. The world around us has a constant impact on what we think. But a heart of stone often remains cold and hard.

So far this sounds pretty hopeless. The world hurts – hardens hearts – and the cycle repeats; and it is very hard to change. Really though, this is the most hope filled story I could tell, because our God turns stone to flesh. What is impossible in the world is God’s great gift.

Ezekiel 36:26 “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you, I will remove your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

God walks with us, fights for us, comforts, and – most importantly – He loves us with a love that this world cannot ever match. When our trust is in God, when our love comes from God, the world’s power in our life is diminished. With God’s heart our hard heart breaks into a heart of flesh – a heart open to love; a heart less likely to hurt others.

Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still.”

Psalm 23:14 “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”

“You don’t have to go looking for love, it is where you come from.” ~~ Werner Erhard

My life is a story of this hope, this love, this God who changes hearts and changes the world. I lived a lot of years with a heart of stone. It was rock formed from years of hurt, hurt from the world that was supposed to love me and then hurt from the world I built around me – my own destructive choices hurting a lot of people around me and hurting myself. I got to a place where I had no hope for a life different from the one I knew. I had a heart locked away without hope or love. I believed that I just wasn’t worth love. I believed that the life I lived was just the life I would always have. I believed that the love and happiness I saw others enjoying would just never be part of my life. I lived in extreme darkness and despair. I was hurting – and without knowing any other way – I was hurting others. I was dragging the people around me into the darkness with me. But somehow, someway, God’s love broke through – God’s love found me. God’s love rescued me.

“The love game is never called off on account of darkness” ~~Tom Masson

I know that it is because people prayed for me. I found my way out of the darkness because there were people around me who didn’t let my failure break them away. I had people surrounding me who didn’t let my brokenness harden their hearts – who didn’t let my heart of stone drag them into my darkness. There were people who kept hold of love – God’s love – and who brought the light of that love into my darkness. There were people who did not give up on the hurting, hardened, angry, hurtful person I had become. I found God’s love because of people who kept feeding God’s love into my life through their lives. They stayed until I found my way out of the darkness; until I hit my knees and gave my heart to God. I gave Him my heart to heal. I opened my heart to real love. I opened myself to love that has not failed me and never will. My heart of stone transformed to a real, beating, feeling heart – not overnight – but over time. There are days that I still fall back, that I feel the hurt, harden and hurt others. But I always grasp to my heavenly Father’s perfect love and back to the heart of love – back to a place where I can love others as God first loves me. I fight until I am back where God has my whole heart.

Matthew 22:37-39 “Jesus replied ‘love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind! This is the first and greatest commandment, and the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself’.”

And this is why my lioness is grasping/cradling/protecting a human heart – my heart – rooted firmly into the rock that she rests on.

Ephesians 3:17-19 “So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep Is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

I cling to God’s love. I root myself in faith to the rock, which will always hold firm. I rest in His love, His grace, and His perfect gift to me.

Do you know God’s love? Have you let Him into your heart; to heal the hurts the world has put in? Have you let Him turn your heart of stone to a heart of flesh? Do you ask Him daily to open your heart to be loved by Him, and to love the world with His love?

1 John 4:19 “We love because He first loved us”.

John 13:34-35 “A new command I give you: love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

John 15:12 “my command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”

Let God’s love wash over you.

Love other’s the way God loves you.

Change the world.

“It’s astounding how little one feels alone when one loves.” ~~ John Buliever

“Love one another and you will be happy. It is as simple and as complicated as that.”  ~~ Michael Leunig